50 Ehefrauen erzählen von den lustigsten Dingen, die ihre Ehemänner tun und die sie zwischen Liebe und Verwirrung hin- und herreißen lassen
Story summary
Die Ehe ist ein rechtsgültiger Vertrag, aber auch ein endloser Content-Stream eines erwachsenen Mannes, der etwas so Bizarres tut, dass man keine andere Wahl hat, als es für Fremde online zu dokumentieren. Aber die Psychologie des gemeinsamen Humors besagt, dass die Dinge, die einen bei einem Fremden irritieren würden, nach ein paar Jahren auf seltsame Weise liebenswert werden
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- Die Ehe ist ein rechtsgültiger Vertrag, aber auch ein endloser Content-Stream eines erwachsenen Mannes, der etwas so Bizarres tut, dass man keine andere Wahl hat, als es für Fremde online zu dokumentieren.
- Aber die Psychologie des gemeinsamen Humors besagt, dass die Dinge, die einen bei einem Fremden irritieren würden, nach ein paar Jahren auf seltsame Weise liebenswert werden
Marriage is many things. A legal contract, a romantic commitment, a shared mortgage, and apparently, an endless content stream of a grown man doing something so bizarre you have no choice but to get your phone out and document it for strangers on the internet.
Wives have been posting about their husbands online for years, and the content falls into a very consistent category. They aren’t complaints or crises. Usually it is just the daily accumulation of small, inexplicable, oddly endearing behaviour that comes with sharing your life with another person. It is funny because it is real, and it is real because every woman reading this just thought of something her own husband does. These are the best of them.
Men and women do not experience domestic life the same way, and we don’t need research to tell us that. Studies on household behavior consistently find that men and women have different thresholds for noticing when something needs to be done, different systems for organizing shared spaces, and a fundamentally different relationship with the concept of a designated spot for things.
It is called the threshold theory, and it basically explains how different tolerances for dirt drive the uneven distribution of labor in a relationship. So if you wonder why he put the scissors back in a completely different drawer and genuinely cannot understand why that is a problem, remember that it all boils down to how we are hardwired.
The more interesting question is why the same behavior that would be maddening in a stranger becomes something you post about with visible affection after a few years of marriage. Psychologists call this the mere exposure effect , the phenomenon where repeated exposure to something increases your positive feelings toward it over time.
The quirk that confused you in year one is the thing that makes you smile in year seven, not because it has changed but because it has become part of a person you are deeply familiar with. Familiarity, in a good relationship, does not breed contempt. It breeds the kind of fond exasperation that generates excellent content.
Humor is also doing serious structural work in a long-term relationship, and the research behind this is surprisingly emphatic. A study published in Personal Relationships found that couples who laugh together report significantly higher relationship satisfaction and feel closer to each other than those who do not.
Relationship psychologist Dr. Jess Carbino notes that shared humor signals a compatible worldview, a shorthand for "we see the same things as ridiculous," which is one of the more reliable forms of intimacy available. The wife filming her husband's completely unnecessary organizational system is documenting proof that they find the same things funny, which is a more solid foundation than most people give it credit for.
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